This list grows from our own experience — these are not paid recommendations or endorsements. They are simply things that genuinely helped us understand ourselves and our situations more clearly. We encourage you to approach anything here prayerfully and with your own discernment.
Books
Atlas of the Heart
Maps over 80 human emotions with precision and compassion. Gave us language we didn’t know we needed.
Daring Greatly
On vulnerability, shame, and the courage to show up authentically.
Braving the Wilderness
On belonging, authenticity, and the courage to stand alone when necessary.
Boundaries in Marriage
Changed how we understood what healthy limits look like in a relationship.
Hold Me Tight
Helped us understand that most conflicts have an underlying emotional need driving them.
What Happened to You
Reframes bad behavior — asking “what happened to you?” rather than “what’s wrong with you?”
Attached
The science of adult attachment and how it shapes every relationship we have.
Attachments
A faith-based perspective on attachment theory and relationships.
His Needs, Her Needs
A practical guide to understanding what each partner needs most in a marriage.
Wild at Heart
Helped us understand a man’s God-given need for adventure, purpose, and respect.
People of the Lie
A difficult but important read on the nature of human evil and self-deception.
Mindsight
How the brain processes emotion and experience — and how we can change our patterns.
While You Were Out
A memoir about mental illness in a family — honest, compassionate, and clarifying.
Educated
A memoir about surviving a difficult family and finding your own mind.
1001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married
We went through most of this before our own marriage. Highly recommended for anyone considering marriage.
How to Avoid Falling in Love with a Jerk
A practical, research-based guide to choosing a healthy partner.
The Peacegiver
A profound Latter-day Saint perspective on the Atonement and peace in relationships.
The Priesthood Power of Women
A faithful exploration of women’s spiritual power and authority in the gospel.
Pursuing the Good Life
Positive psychology applied to everyday life — practical and grounded.
The Tears That Taught Me
On grief, healing, and the growth that comes through difficulty.
Conference talks
Elder Jeffrey R. Holland · October 2013
Elder Quentin L. Cook · October 2023
Elder Mark A. Bragg · April 2023
President Russell M. Nelson · October 2020
Elder Dallin H. Oaks · October 2000
Elder David A. Bednar · April 2018
Elder Patrick Kearon · April 2022
President Dieter F. Uchtdorf · April 2010
YouTube videos
Thoughtful, scholarly Come Follow Me study with Taylor Halverson and Tyler Griffin · scripturecentral.org
Warm, accessible Come Follow Me study with Emily Belle Freeman and David Butler · dontmissthisstudy.com
Deep, insightful exploration of temple covenants and symbolism · brotherdunford.org
Accessible, well-produced introductions to psychology concepts
Videos about mental illness and personality disorders
Search YouTube for reputable sources — university channels, licensed therapists, and mental health organizations are good starting points
Favorite links
Ensign, April 1997 · Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
Ensign, June 2000 · Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
General Conference, October 2013 · On mental illness and the healing power of Christ
General Handbook · Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
American Psychiatric Association · Overview of all ten personality disorder types
Red Tent Living · On how we show up — or don’t — for people who are suffering
“Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.”Matthew 7:7
This list will grow over time as we continue to learn. If you have found something that has helped you through a difficult marriage or divorce and would like to share it with our community, we’d love to hear from you.